Once more into the breech

Well, here I go again. Not much has changed since the last post - not lost any weight, still feeling miserable. Part of the reason I haven't got back into the swing of things has been a full month of travel - part holiday, part work, part family visits - and I am one of those people who finds it inpossible to stick to a diet when I'm out of my routine. Not that I can blame it all on circumstance - there are certainly days I've been home and could have got myself into gear, and I sure didn't need to go so overboard at Easter. But that's par for the course really.

I tried to get back into it today with a fast day but fell off the wagon. At least a failed fast day is much, much better than a regular day. I just wish I could regain the motivation I had a few months ago. Honestly, I don't understand why it's such an elusive and mysterious thing. I want it just as badly as ever, but it's like there's a switch in my brain, and I have no control over when it goes on and off.

I don't even know what I should do now, to be honest. Calorie count tomorrow, then back to my regular fast day Monday? Fast tomorrow? I know I'm not in the right headspace but that seems to be admitting defeat. 

I don't know how on earth to get back into it, I just know that I have to.